Wednesday, April 05, 2006

Yancey McGill: In His Own, Um, Words ... Sort of

In case you missed this gem in The State newspaper this morning, it appears a first-grader at one of our state's public schools somewhere along the "Corridor of Shame" is now writing opinion-editorial pieces for Senator Yancey McGill.

Rarely does a reputable newspaper like The State allow something this poorly-written to be published, but we at FITS would like to extend to them our most sincere thanks for doing so in this instance.

Without further adieu, here in his own, um, words ... sort of ... is State Senator Yancey McGill:

Cheap Shots from the Governor's Office
By Sen. J. Yancey McGill

(OK, good title, you're possibly onto something here and while your name is definitely a little odd, you've got us hooked).

This issue of a driver for Andre Bauer is the most ridiculous and absurd implication and misrepresentation of the facts that I have ever experienced in the 35 years of public service.

(Wait a minute ... don't you mean "in my 35 years of public service?" What the hell is "in the 35 years of public service?" Are there other people's years of public service you meant to reference here but forgot? And isn't it somebody else's position on the issue of a driver for Andre you find ridiculous and absurd, not the issue of a driver for Andre itself? I mean, that's what the rest of us find ridiculous about the whole thing, but ...)

Political mind games and cheap political shots by the governor and his staff spokesmen have set a new, dirty low in South Carolina government. The governor and his staff spokesmen should apologize to the citizens of South Carolina and to my family.

(So you're saying there's something political going on here ... we gotcha ... but isn't Joel Sawyer, the governor's staff spokesman, just one person? I mean, sure he could probably stand to drop five pounds or so, but the last time FITS checked he was still a single human being, as well as the only person other than Sanford himself who speaks for the administration ...)

From the start, instead of working with the lieutenant governor on issues, the governor has never given quality time to the lieutenant governor. The theme has been all about self and his political future. He shall and will not shift the focus on his negative leadership to my son, John McGill, or myself.

(Forgetting for the moment that Sanford gave Andre the Office on Aging in 2004 in exchange for legislative support on the income tax cut, support that never materialized by the way, you'd probably want to go with "shall not and will not" there ... More importantly, exactly what kind of "quality time" is Andre looking for? Hmmm ...)

Honor, trust, love, compassion and godly principles are and have been my family’s basic values and successes. My civic policy has always been one of fairness, openness and sensitivity to others. I have never believed in shifting my burdens on anyone else. Though I am not perfect, thanks for God’s grace, I walk quietly, have tried to give all credit to others and have attempted to show godly love and compassion to my fellow South Carolinians.

(God is probably happy you capitalized His Holy Name at least once out of three times there ...)

I am proud of my son’s work ethic, honesty and commitment. He is a fine young man. He is one of our many wonderful young people in South Carolina trying to make life better for all of our citizens. Young people should be encouraged to participate in our communities at all levels. John stated to me some time ago that he was not interested in security work but enjoyed solving problems, constituent service and working with the citizens of our state.

(No problems here. We're down with all that. Your boy is definitely good peeps ... )

Our lieutenant governor, Andre Bauer, admitted that he was not correct in speeding and so stated that he was not above the law. He also stated that he would adjust his overactive schedule of meetings and events accordingly. Lt. Gov. Bauer is sincere and quick to access for all citizens and not just a chosen few. This man is honest, intelligent and one of the hardest-working public elected state officials I have ever met.

(Andre was honest of course, except when reporters asked him point blank beforehand if he'd been pulled for a speeding ticket recently ... speaking of which, don't we want our public officials to be subject to the law all the time? Not just when they're caught trying to be above it? And finally, he's "quick to access?" What does that mean? Again, things that make you go hmmm ...)

The lieutenant governor’s potential security detail was requested and talked about with the chief of the State Law Enforcement Division some three years ago, but not approved. Chief Robert Stewart’s decision was based on absence of legislative direction on the issue, and I commend Chief Stewart for the excellent job he performs at SLED.

(Everybody loves Chief Stewart, and God knows we could all use a little more "legislative direction" in our lives. Oh yeah, sub an "an" in there in front of absence next time ...)

For the record, I did not request, negotiate or ask anyone for special or standard job help for my son at the lieutenant governor’s office. John McGill’s abilities of communication, fast reaction and clear understanding of his position and issues qualify him for his present job and any other such position. He did not seek this position at the lieutenant governor’s office, but was asked if he would be interested in his present position by the lieutenant governor.

(We know you probably said something convincing in there, we're just laughing so hard at this point that it's become increasingly difficult to take your op-ed seriously ...)

John was truly honored and felt that he could contribute and accepted this position.I rarely respond to any articles of news about myself, but I must stand up for my son, as any father would. This dark misrepresentation of the truth does not tickle my intelligence nor lend any credibility to the governor’s inability to work with others.

(Obviously it didn't "tickle" your writing ability either ... and we're guessing you meant to say it didn't lend any credibility to the governor's ability to work with others, which we're not even sure is a real sentence to begin with even if you had gotten it right ... next time try "nor lend credibility to those who claim the governor works well with others" ... )

In conclusion, twisting the truth is highly shameful and not the South Carolina or American way, as I know.

(Wouldn't that be South Carolinian and American way? We've never heard of the America Way ...)

This governor should not be re-elected!

(A very wise person once told FITS, "you only get three exclamation points a lifetime, use them wisely ...")

Originally, I had great hope and expectation of this new governor, but now I agree with many others that I am saddened by his politically cheap mentality.

(You "agree with many others that I am saddened?" Try "I agree with many others who are saddened ...)

Sen. McGill, a Democrat, represents portions of Florence, Georgetown, Horry and Williamsburg counties in the S.C. Senate.

(Finally, a well-written sentence).

Give us a call next-time, Yancey. It's great you're giving public school kids in your district an opportunity to showcase their skills, but you really should leave these things to the professionals ...


Anonymous Anonymous said...

Probably like most readers, I still have no idea what he is talking about in this article...glad someone else found this confusing and funny. Reelect McGill!!

8:58 PM

Blogger Mike Reino said...

In conclusion, twisting the truth is highly shameful and not the South Carolina or American way, as I know.
Is it just me, or does this imply that Yancey knows a lot about twisting the truth?? This is why a politician's idiot son shouldn't be allowed in office - by that I mean Yancey, since his Dad was mayor of Kingstree. It is no coincidence that Williamsburg Co. is so economically depressed. The only reason that unemployment dropped is that 5% of the entire population has left since 2000. Dealing with him and Leatherman on NESA is going to be a real picnic..

9:09 PM

Anonymous Anonymous said...

This person is a Senator? South Carolina really is in trouble.

8:01 PM

Anonymous Anonymous said...

That's it, Yancey should retire and start writing speeches for "W." Having him come to your defense appears to be about like the French coming in as your "re-enforcement" in time of war.

3:15 PM

Anonymous Nettie said...

Use of "godly" as a descriptor is gramatically correct, as is "biblically". Why it isn't capitalized in this sense I don't know, but I didn't go through Christian school for nothing.

3:44 PM

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Amend the SC Constitution!


2:08 PM


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