... IRREVERENCE, INSTITUTIONALIZED ...

Wednesday, May 03, 2006

Sic Willie Towed for Handicapped Indiscretion

In hot water for parking in a handicapped spot in the Vista two weeks ago, the long arm of the Columbia Parking Police finally caught up with our favorite bad boy Sic Willie this afternoon, towing his now infamous 1997 Infiniti Q45 and forcing him to cough up over $200 for the indiscretion.

FITS' beat writer Heather S. witnessed the towing as it took place on Main Street in downtown Columbia this afternoon at around 2:50 p.m., concluding a top-secret mission Columbia Mayor Bob Coble referred to publicly for the first time today as "Operation Lost Vehicle."

"This operation has been in the works for the past two weeks," Coble told FITS. "As soon as we received the photographic evidence of the indiscretion, City Manager Charles Austin, Chief of Police Dean Crisp and myself began laying the groundwork for Operation Lost Vehicle. Today, thanks to the ingenuity of our parking police and the good people over at Elgin's body shop, Sic Willie has finally been brought to justice for this horrific deed."

Pictured above retrieving his vehicle from Elgin's tow lot on Gervais Street, Sic Willie refused to comment about the incident when questioned by FITS.

6 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

glad the selfish, cidistic son of a bitch got what was coming to him.

4:11 PM

 
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Anonymous,
What exactly is "cidistic"? You my friend are a perfect example of why we should support Sanford's education reform.

7:46 AM

 
Anonymous Anonymous said...

You think it is comical or post-worthy to be towed from a handicap parking space? Hmm... taking advantage of a space offered to those in need of it. Kind of a jackass move.

2:15 PM

 
Anonymous Anonymous said...

of course will how many handicapped people are there out at three in the morning when you troll for drunk coeds?

never met a more pathetic loser in my life.

2:23 PM

 
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Well, thats $200.00 less for the Will Folks Defense Fund for the next time that Will gets liquored up and pushes a member of the opposite sex.

It looks like Will will have to resume collecting the aluminum cans out at Quinn's Backporch for recycling to bolster up his "war chest" or as Will reportedly likes to call it, his "consulting fees".

2:41 PM

 
Anonymous Will Folks said...

hey everybody look at me!!! I like to get drunk and beat up girls and pretend to run campaigns from a high-price office my mommy and daddy pay for!

hire me please please pretty please!!!

i have a gay ass company name too, viewpoliteeek.

3:08 PM

 

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