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Saturday, June 24, 2006

The "Jer"den Endorsement

So let's get this straight - Dr. Henry Jordan (left) is endorsing incumbent go-karter Andre Bauer in next Tuesday's Lite Gov runoff because he thinks Bauer is more likely to support Gov. Mark Sanford's school choice initiative?

Say what?

Aside from the fact that a freshman Representative from friggin' Green Pond, S.C., has more pull on school choice than the Lieutenant Senate Gavel-Banger, let's be polite (well, sort of) and do Dr. "Screw the Buddhists and Kill the Muslims" the favor of analyzing his curious, last-minute Jerdenorsement a bit more closely.

First of all, Dr. "Jer-den" has his head firmly planted in the deserts of Iraq if he thinks for one second that Andre Bauer is going to do ANYTHING to help this governor out if reelected.

Sure, we all know how much Andre loves to talk in public about supporting the governor's agenda. In fact, aside from updating his My Space account, the only thing Andre probably enjoys more than talking in public about his support for the governor's agenda is ripping the governor's agenda to shreds once the TV cameras are gone and he's behind closed doors again.

Take the governor's other top two agenda items - income tax and government restructuring. Bauer claims to support both in public, but he lobbied aggressively behind the scenes to make sure neither got out of the State Senate - even after the governor gave him his plum Office on Aging (a.k.a. Politicization of Elderly) gig, along with its built-in electoral constituency.

Seriously, you're actually going to have us believe that Andre told his fellow Rod Shealy clients Jakie Knotts and Luke Rankin (the only two Republicans who wouldn't vote to shut down Sen. Phil Leventis' income tax filibuster) to jump and they didn't ask "how high?"

Yeah, right. Jakie would give Luke Rankin an open-mouth kiss on the State House steps (and Luke Rankin would like it) if Andre told them to.

And we're supposed to buy that Andre telling the governor to stuff it on restructuring even after Sanford promised him that he'd be the guy on the ticket if it passed was really a show of unanimity?

The truth is, when it comes to finding people to blame for the fact that restructuring didn't pass and our income tax rate is still effectively the highest in the Southeast, put Andre Bauer at the top of that list right alongside his fellow Senate Shealy-ites. In fact when you get right down to it, the only reason Andre probably hasn't worked his anti-Sanford voodoo on the school choice issue is because it's never made it to the "deliberative body" over which he ceremoniously presides, having barely missed making it out of the House two years in a row.

Watching politicians like Andre Bauer and others flip-flop on Sanford issues is a lot like watching a high school basketball team doing wind sprints. They run as fast and hard as they can toward the governor's issues during their campaigns, but once they get elected, they turn around and run just as fast and just as hard in the opposite direction.

Claiming to support Andre Bauer because he would advance even one iota of the Sanford agenda is like hiring Rosanne Barr to model underwear, or seeking out Elizabeth Taylor for marriage counseling, or naming Osama Bin Laden the new Director of Homeland Security.

It's literally as asinine as reading one of those "Never Siphon By Mouth" warning stickers you see on gasoline pumps and deciding THAT's the moment you're going to start questioning authority.

We desperately need school choice in South Carolina, but assuming Andre Bauer has either the power or inclination to do anything that moves us closer toward that objective is a lot like assuming he actually helped shorten lines at the DMV or any of the other things he brags about accomplishing in his reality-challenged television commercials.

FITS will have our official runoff endorsements ready for you tomorrow in the "Return of the Echo Chamber," but as far as the Lt. Governor's race is concerned, if you're a school choice advocate or anybody who believes in lower taxes, less spending and more efficient government, do what 63% of the voters already did two weeks ago - cast a ballot that shows Andre Bauer the friggin' door.

Of course, do make sure it doesn't hit him on the way out. After all, we wouldn't want him reinjuring that heel.

Oh, and Dr. Jordan, one bit of parting advice for you, friend. Either change the spelling of your name or start pronouncing it the way the letters are currently arranged. This is South Carolina, dude, a state where graduate school is also known as "Hooked on Phonics."

Right now, you're just confusing people.

8 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Let me get this straight -
In the past 14 days: Jordan stated,
1. Bauer was an embarrasment in a tv ad.
2. Bauer was ethically challenges in the Aiken Standard.
3. He (Jordan) was running to support the Sanford agenda.

Then, Jenny Sanford gives what many consider to be the Sanford endorsement and says she is voting for Mike Campbell...

And Jordan goes and says he's going against the Sanford choice, and is voting for someone who is not only ethically challenged, but is an embarrasment to the state.

Hmm...

Now let's connect some more dots -
1. Jordan said in Cherokee Co. that hs was running to help Mike Campbell beat Andre Bauer by pushing the race into a run-off.
2. Jordan said he wasn't going to endorse.
3. Rod Shealy has a crooked history of running third candidates to help his own clients...

Could Henry Jordan have been just a dirty political trick by Rod Shealy.

Was Henry Jordan a political plant?

3:26 PM

 
Anonymous Anonymous said...

How conservative is Andre Bauer:
Lies to the press about speeding. Breaks commandment of thou shall not lie.

Takes $1,000 from Sun Cruz casinos on May 15, 2006 - just look at his online filing. Sun Cruz is the entity with ties to Jack Abramhoff and widespread DC panic.

Bauer says he worked to ban gay marriage, yet has an intern named Arron Hoagland, found on Bauer's myspace.com account who says he interns for Andre Bauer so he can help promote gay rights...Bauer also told the Family Foundation - They should have the same exact RIGHTS as heterosexual people.

Bauer says he is Pro-Life but is quoted in the Greenville News as saying, "I don't know if life begins at conception. I know we lose a lot of people who might be Republicans who fear being ostracized if they're not 100 percent pro-life."

Bauer said in the Post and Courier, Communist Murdering once Public Enemy Thug #1 Fidel Castro was "sincere and disarming" after meeting with Castro along with Convicted Cock-Fighting Felon Charlie Sharpe.

The State reports, “Republican Lt. Gov. Andre Bauer hasn’t helped either. He’s done nothing to advance the governor’s plan. If anything, Bauer has worked to undercut the governor, associates say."

In 2004, Bauer worked against the conservative Republican State Senate campaigns of Katherine Jenerette, Warren Arthur, and Michael Holt, while holding fundraisers and openly supporting Democrats Gerald Malloy and Dick Elliot. Bauer joined Democrat Senators Tommy Moore, John Drummond, Brad Hutto and John Land in the affair for Elliot.

Bauer has a website on the scandalous myspace.com. His profile includes what WIS-TV cited to be women too provocative to show on tv, girls under the age of 15, and interns in bikinis. The Greenville News noted that Bauer's profile included links to "Matt's Mom is HOTT' where Group Sex was the topic du jour. Bauer's profile also had links to sex toy dealers, gay interns, and many other unscruplous characters.


Bauer claims to run a postive campaign yet employees the most negative operative in politics, Rod Shealy.

Bauer claims to have worked for Tort Reform, yet gave what the Greenville News described as a pep talk to Trial Lawyers on the matter while speaking at their annual convention in Atlanta, Ga.

The Facts Prove Ander Bauer is not Gov-Lite, He is Bill Clinton-lite. He is a philandering, lying, cheat who is politically in bed with liberal democrats like himself - Gerald Malloy, Dick Elliot, Yancey McGill, Darrel Jackson, and RINOs Jake Knotts and Luke Rankin.

3:48 PM

 
Anonymous Anonymous said...

The truth about Rod Shealy will surface soon. He's a crook.

7:08 PM

 
Blogger Quovadis said...

"So Henry Jordan just a dirty political trick by Rod Shealy":
------ So that's why we see Rod (aka Steele, if J.McG.'s idol per invisible ink post on MySpace?) Shealy publically endorsing Henry's brother Brad one day and Henry follows through the next day (per his 11th Commandment of SC politics) with his testament of Andre being born again, or again, or is this fourth time now?

And they all agree speeding & reckless driving could never endanger the life of any of the unborn or elderly and definitely not a form of euthanasia, duh. And this trinity of ethical paragons agreed ALL the newspapers in the universe are just doing their liberal spin when they say SC has one of the highest rates of vehicle fatalities in the USA. And any reference that speeding in SC accounts for 45+% of all fatalities whereas the US average in 2004 was only 39% is just some liberal propaganda!( hmmmm, wonder if Henry said high fatalities were ok if only Muslims & Buddhists were killed, would? naw, it's not in the Board's minutes! ) See, just another SC First, like education and domestic abuse, for which Bauer has worked so hard in his Part time $46,000 per year job -- and what does the avg SC person make in a Full time job ? Irrelevant spin by those liberal newspapers of course!

If the SC people excercise a litle common sense and care about ethics and morals at all, and the SC streets, highways and skies are a litte safer without The annointed one, maybe Sanford could send him as a permanent ambassor to Cuba to set up a MySpace acct for Fidel and his friends Kim & Hugo ?

10:29 PM

 
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Rod Shealy is a crook?

You are delusional (Will, stop making anon comments on your own site, dude.)

The truth will come out soon about the CAMPBELL connection to SunCruz and then we will see who the real lying crooks are.

6:17 AM

 
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Rod Shealy isn't only a crook - he's got the morals of a junkyard dog. If any of his candidates talk about "family values" then we should all laugh out loud and vote for the other guy.

7:27 AM

 
Anonymous Carolina Observer said...

This is truly funny...Mr. Anon not having the "kahunas" to post his name, yet starting his own blog on the response page. Nice jib lightweight. When you finish cut an paste from the Campbell op-research file, come back with an original comment.

2:20 PM

 
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Lay off the criticism of Dr. Jordan. It's his name and he can pronounce it anyway he wants to pronounce it.

6:30 AM

 

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