Happy Hour With A Purpose?
We about lost it when we saw this link from Laurin Manning's blog recently.
Apparently, since 2001 Virginia Gov. Mark Warner has hosted a series of political events called "Happy Hour With A Purpose." The series even has it's own website, the aptly-named but for some reason still odd-sounding www.happyhourwithapurpose.com.
In fact, one of these "Happy Hour With A Purpose" (es) is actually scheduled for Columbia, S.C. this coming Monday, September 25 at Jillian's.
Now our girl Laurin makes no bones about her love of both happy hour (Chardonn-hey!) or her worship of Warner.
In fact, she's gone so far as to create a virtual version of herself for the specific purpose of tooling around virtual soundstages on Warner's website (no word yet on whether virtual Laurin and virtual Mark Warner have hooked up yet).
Unfortunately, with all due respect to the undisputed Queen of the S.C. Blogosphere, we've got to call b.s. on this one.
As it turns out, where we come from, the purpose of Happy Hour was not to hear Mark Warner flap his gums about how great he is and why he should be President.
In fact, that's not even in the Top 100,000 purposes for Happy Hour.
Last time we checked, the purpose of Happy Hour was to drink numerous alcoholic beverages at a discounted cost and - to borrow a phrase from Vince Vaughn's legendary Wedding Crashers soliloquy - "maybe get hopped up enough to make some bad decisions."
Happy Hour in Columbia's Vista district - like Happy Hour in thousands of mid-sized cities all across our great nation - is one of the few unimpeachably pure, distinctly American things we've got left in this crazy world.
There's just an indescribable poetry and limitless entertainment value to be derived from watching dozens of inebriated, cologne-drenched mid-level downtown sales executives knocking back some cold ones, flashing business cards and throwing Lincolns around like candy while they try to play a little game called "just the tip" (just for a minute, just to see how it feels) with a bunch of dolled-up West Columbia dental hygienists' receptionists doubling as Bon Jovi groupies.
That's America, people. And Mark Warner wants to interrupt this defining moment in our nation's heritage to help us "bridge ethnic and generational differences in the community?"
There's plenty of time to talk politics and be all serious about society and what ails it from 9-5, people. In fact there's probably too much time.
Don't give Happy Hour a bad name, Gov. Warner.
Show us you feel where we're coming from by getting a little glazy-eyed yourself, putting politics on the backburner and giving our homegirl Laurin the ole "up-down."
Just for a minute. Just to see how it feels.